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after years of bitching about them and avoiding them and being somewhat of a luddite about them, i finally gave in the intense, mounting peer pressure and got myself a cell fone.
pretty fuckin’ wild huh?

yeah. not really.
it is not proving that exciting though because i get zero reception in my apartment.
none.
not even enough to call someone and come out sounding like a cheap robot underwater.
but whatever. it has all these special extra features that are pretty helpful.

it does my taxes.
when i talk into it, it tells me if i need to brush my teeth.
it counts calories and helps me avoid carbs.
and it keeps my pocket warm on breezy winter nights.

the future rules!